This is an excerpt from

"Zen Miracles"
Finding Peace in an Insane
World
by Brenda Shoshanna 

"To separate what we like from
what we dislike is the disease of
the mind." -Sosan, On Believing
in Mind

This famous quote suggests that
the pain and loss we experience
in relationships has nothing to do
with the other person, it is a
disease lodged within our own
mind. We cause this suffering by
 separating what we like from
what we dislike, by constantly
judging and condemning others,
by refusing our love if a person
doesn't make the grade.

To separate what we like from
what we dislike kills all
relationships both with others
and with ourselves. This basic
tenet of Zen is a profound
instruction both for meditation
and relationships in everyday
life."